Download How to Talk so Little Kids Will Listen: A Survival Guide to Life with Children Ages 2-7, by Joanna Faber Julie King
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How to Talk so Little Kids Will Listen: A Survival Guide to Life with Children Ages 2-7, by Joanna Faber Julie King
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From School Library Journal
Parent and educator Faber, with educator King, picks up where esteemed mom Adele Faber (How To Talk So Kids Will Listen) left off with this updated "survival guide" for talking to little kids and gaining compliance. Her wisdom is in the same affectionate and funny style of mom: "Enough with all the talk about feelings. It's lovely to know we're enhancing our children's confidence…but we still have to get our kids to do things." Faber zeroes in on the most common (and irritating) things and tactics little ones employ, and provides caregivers with a clear and supportive path to holding their own. From tattling ("snitches and whistleblowers") to runaways ("kids who take off in the parking lot and other public places"), the authors describe exactly what life with little kids is like and make neither excuses nor pedagogical pronouncements; their advice is always supportive, appropriate, and ultimately best for the parking lot escapee in question. VERDICT Parents should not be put off by this volume's length. The "How To Talk" books are treasures to read. All libraries should acquire and recommend with gusto.—Julianne Smith, Ypsilanti District Library, MI
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Review
"Yes, the How to Talk tools work for young children! It is never too soon to reflect children's emotions, acknowledge their wishes, and see things from their perspective. Faber and King are like wise, calm friends that arrive just in time to help you through the toughest moments, with no judging or shaming. In fact, they have just as much empathy for parents as they have for children. They understand that punishment and control are dead ends, and they offer a clear path towards cooperation and connection."--Lawrence J. Cohen, Ph.D., author of Playful Parenting"This helpful gem of a book guides parents and other caregivers to tune in to the internal worlds of young children to allow their minds to be seen and respected. With practical suggestions and useful illustrations, the authors clearly convey these important steps to guiding our children's development. Cultivating such mindsight for our youth is essential to creating a kinder and more resilient next generation."--Daniel J. Siegel, M.D. Author, Mind: A Journey to the Heart of Being Human and Executive Director, Mindsight Institute "Faber and King have done the impossible! This guide to how to talk so little kids will listen is BRILLIANT. Every parent needs to read this book because it teaches skills that are solidly based on research. The book is magnificent."--John Gottman, author of Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child“Relatable and authentic… [Faber’s and King’s] creative ideas will help parents feel they are not alone in dealing with little runaways, arguments over tooth brushing, tattling, and numerous child-rearing dilemmas.’”--Publishers Weekly"Wonderful...reader-friendly [and] a truly indispensable book for parents and for anyone else who interacts with young children.”--Work and Family Life
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Product details
Paperback: 432 pages
Publisher: Scribner; Reprint edition (January 10, 2017)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 150113163X
ISBN-13: 978-1501131639
Product Dimensions:
5.5 x 1.1 x 8.4 inches
Shipping Weight: 1 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review:
4.8 out of 5 stars
234 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#620 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
Ok, so I’ve been wanting to write a review for this book since I received it – when it first came out – but I can’t find it in my house. I think that my child took it and is reading it so that he can learn all our tricks. Haha. My child doesn’t actually read yet but I am lucky I did before it went missing because it has done no less than change my relationship with him.How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen is full of great, doable advice that is general enough for any situation, but with specific examples so that you know exactly what the authors are trying to explain. The real-life examples could easily have come from my family. For example, the child who wants something that fell into a crack in his car seat and it is inaccessible to him and to me, the driver. Joanna and Julie give great advice on how to respond to difficult situations with little kids that could easily cause a major meltdown.For example, when the thing falls into the crack in the car seat and I can’t reach it, in the past my child would start yelling and screaming and then move into a full-on tantrum. I always felt that I had two choices:1: I could pull over and stop, get out of the car, open the door where his car seat is, and retrieve the thing. That would stop the tantrum before it starts, but it would teach him that he is welcome to have his way whenever he threatens me with a tantrum.Or, 2: I could not get the thing, tell him to live with it for the 10 minutes (or whatever) until we get to where we are going. That response would surely invite crying escalating, into a full-on, inconsolable tantrum as the ride went on. I would have to listen to the screaming for the whole ride and then deal with it when we got to where we are going.Julie and Joanna suggest a great third response: agree with my child that the thing is really important. Tell him that I wish I could reach the car seat to retrieve it. Then really get dramatic with it: talk about having a button on the dashboard that I could just push and a hundred of those things would magically appear! And then ask what we could do with a hundred of those things, until my child is so caught up in the fantasy that he has forgotten how much he wants the thing and we get to where we are going safe, sound, and happy. I’ve actually had to do this a number of times since reading the book. My child’s response still amazes me every time!It sounds like magic, but it’s not. It is a way of listening to your child and validating his/her experience. How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen gives lots of ideas, stories and examples of how to do this in any number of difficult situations. I do want to be clear, this isn’t magic, and sometimes even the best skills don’t produce sunny results. But more often than not, as a result of the skills I was able to pick up from this book, I can at least head off tantrums and other bad behavior before it starts, even if my child isn’t all smiles.
This would be great if I hadn’t already read the normal version. I feel like it’s a waste to get this if you’ve already read how to talk so kids will listen.I do like their approaches but I don’t feel like this really helps a ton with parenting a small (under 3 years) toddler. Wish they had more examples of situations that you get into with a small toddler and how to handle them.
When my kids, now 26 and 23 years old, were younger, I read “how to talk so kids Will listen and listen so kids will talk“.Now I am a nanny of a toddler, 2 1/2 years old, and a baby, Nine months old. This book has helped me to avoid the frequent arguments, meltdowns, jealousy, and throwing incidents that constantly occur with the 2 1/2 yr old.I was delighted when I learned that the authors are the daughters of the first book’s authors!! They have done an incredible job!! A must have book for every Nanny, Mom, Dad, Grandma & Grandpa!!!
I recieved this book only 2 days ago and I am already half way through it! I have to force myself to put it down so I can get a good nights sleep. I tried a technique from the book yesterday on a child who missed their parents and wouldn’t stop crying...it worked! I usually sympathize with them, which leads no where. So I tried the imagination technique (“Wouldn’t it be awesome if we could always be with our parents?! Oh, or what if they could come to school with us every day?!â€). The child got excited and really did forget the sadness she felt.I can’t wait to get into the rest of this book. I feel like reading it a few times over to make sure this information sticks in my brain! I have read many boring text books about guiding young children, but few have immediately helped me like this book has.
I have a four year old, who was three when I read this book, and man, was it necessary. They tell you about the “terrible twosâ€, but then they keep the biggest secret — THREE IS EVEN WORSE. Three year olds are tiny little terrorists, and I needed all the help I could get to negotiate my way through that year.How to Talk so Little Kids Will Listen gives you lots of simple techniques for communicating with your little kid, whether you’re trying to get them to do something, get them not to do something, or just get along. It is full of real world examples that the authors have culled from the classes they’ve done throughout the years, which I found really helpful. It turns out, your kid probably isn’t unique — there are plenty of others out there doing the same things they are doing. One thing I especially liked is that they summarize each chapter into bullet points at the end. Something you could easily print out and tape to your fridge for reference.So if you too are living with a tiny terrorist, give this book a shot! All you parents out there are doing a good job.Also, age four is SO MUCH BETTER.
I'm a Child Psychiatrist and this book is my #1 recommended book for parents of kids under 10. I personally used the original book with my kids (and my spouse, lol, really good communication strategies) and this one is even more refined and even more clearly laid out compared to the original which I thought couldn't be improved. Great book, thank you to the authors, you have improved the lives of so many families! Don't miss the one for teens.
If you have a very difficult headstrong toddler get this book and follow the methods in it! They work ! My toddler is also easier going in general because of it. Our entire family is amazed at the difference in behavior!
I always thought I was a pretty good parent, and then, my kid became a threenager. Suddenly, he was talking back, ignoring instructions, and throwing tantrums the second he heard the word "no." This book has helped me approach his behavior in a way that not only redirects him in the moment, but also helps prevent it from happening in the future. (And it gave me some great ideas for what to do when all I want to do is yell!)
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